Tag Archives: Scotland

Same Rules Apply

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Morning Tash Appreciators,

A couple of weeks ago I saw Filth, the film adaptation of Irvine Welsh‘s book of the same name. For the first 45 minutes or so the audience laughed as Bruce Robertson – a dirty, racist, sexist, drug- addled cop – strutted around Edinburgh causing chaos and doing his utmost to manipulate his way to a promotion:

Tash Friday 25:10:13

After that though, the perception of his appearance changed as the audience discovered the reasons why Bruce is the way he is. I don’t think I’m ruining the plot by saying that, while he is all of the things I’ve already mentioned, beneath his filthy veneer is a broken, lonely man struggling with mental illness. At the end of film, as the credits whizzed by to “Love Really Hurts Without You” by Billy Ocean, I was in bits. It’s stuck with me since then and I’ll never listen to that song (or a cover of “Creep” by Clint Mansell) the same way again. This week’s Tash, by the way, is Billy Ocean:
Tash Friday 25:10:13 2

I was thinking about the film afterwards, and what really upset me was that Bruce was totally alone. He was alone because of the way he treated those around him but it struck me that he had lost his family, he bullied his only “friend” and he hated his colleagues. Even without any underlying issues, circumstances like those would pose a problem for any person. After all, by my reckoning, we spend the majority of our lives in three ways: asleep; with our friends and family; or with our colleagues. If something has upset our relationships with one of those groups then that would be upsetting, but if something is wrong with all three then that’s a perfect storm – just like the tempest in Bruce Robertson’s mind.

The same rules apply to family, friends and colleagues: we don’t often choose them; we don’t always like them; we will in all likelihood be around them for a significant time; but, if by some quirk of fate we find ourselves with people who end up being a blend of family, friend or colleague then that’s something to really cherish. In the film, Bruce’s problem is that once he’s lost his family, his friends and colleagues follow shortly after.

TF usually has a point and this week’s is two-fold: firstly, people who appear to have filthy characters tend to be that way for a reason; and, secondly, most of us are driven, intelligent folk who could, if we wanted, manipulate those around us for our own ends. The most common example of that is in the workplace but, to my mind, getting ahead in that way is a pretty hollow victory – is it not better to be able to say your colleagues are friends rather than being promoted but without any support? The other thing is that if you act in a way that is manipulative or underhand then, when someone has the opportunity to get you back, the same rules apply.

If you get the chance to see Filth, take it: James McAvoy is unbelievable:
Have a great weekend folks!
#keepgoing
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Tashcrawl 2014

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Good morning Tash Appreciators,

First this week, an announcement. Quite independently of TF HQ, a sub-crawl (it has apparently been christened by one particularly poetic Appreciator as a “Tash-Crawl”) will take place tomorrow in Glasgow. I understand it will start with a large lunch at the Counting House and the first stop will be at around 2pm at Times Square, next to St Enoch Square station. All are welcome and although Tash related apparel is recommended, it’s not essential. The arrangements will be on Facebook and twitter. There is a fair possibility that, during the course of the afternoon, this:

 Tash Friday 20:9:13 3
 
May turn into this:

 
Tash Friday 20:9:13 2
 
 
For those who may not be familiar with Glasgow’s subway system, the Tash-Crawl is but the latest incarnation of a very old Glaswegian activity – the subcrawl. Only in Glasgow would people willingly spend the best part of a day travelling in a smelly old orange train purely in the interests of finding a novel way to have fifteen drinks. What makes this even stranger is that Glaswegian comedy duo Francie and Josie used an entirely complimentary song about the subway in their set:
 

 
It’s strange where people get their enjoyment from, I suppose, and another example of that is the release this week of Grand Theft Auto V: the fifth incarnation of what must be one of Scotland’s most successful exports.
 
Tash Friday 20:9:13 4
 
GTA, as it’s usually called, has made Dundee/Edinburgh’s Rockstar North over £500 million in it’s first week and is apparently even more popular than a good Subcrawl. Some people will find it difficult to understand where the fun is in a game where the player is encouraged to commit a variety of pretty awful crimes. Some may even think the game is dangerous.
 
TF isn’t a platform from which to preach morality and I’ve got nothing to add to the debate about whether games like GTA should be allowed. However, what I will say is that we should be pleased that a Scottish product has managed to be so successful for so long. What is clear is that regardless of whether it’s a subcrawl (which could hardly be said to be healthy) or a violent video-game, people tend to be interested, now and again, in things that aren’t good for them.
 
This week’s Tash is a man whose activities would easily fit into the plot of GTA. Although he’s a dangerous and unpleasant chap, we still find him interesting. There have been numerous news reports about him over the years and Eric Bana even starred in a film about his life. I’m talking about Mark “Chopper” Read:
 
Tash Friday 20:9:13 5
 
If you’re wondering where his ears are, he asked one of his pals to cut them off with a razor blade while in prison. See what I mean, you’re interested, aren’t you!
 
Have a great weekend folks!
 
#keepgoing
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Redemption squared

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Salut Tash Appreciators,

With the Tour de France starting in Corsica tomorrow, cycling is our starting and ending point this week:

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Courtesy of: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mrk_andrsn/

Although that picture includes four world-class riders, it wasn’t taken in France, or anywhere with a particular culture of cycling. It was actually taken during the UK National Road Race last Sunday, which took place in Glasgow.

The front chap, in blue, is David Millar – Scotland’s top road cyclist. Some of you may have heard of him because of his “colourful” past as an ex-doper. He was caught, banned and almost jailed for his part in the doping culture of early 2000s. But since then, he has done more than anyone else in cycling to make/keep it clean. He always been proud of his Scottish background but Sunday seemed to have a special significance for him. You could tell that not only from his performance (which was superb) but also from the tweets he posted after the race:

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There are, as I see it, similarities between Millar and the city he was racing in: both have had a rough time and both looked like their best days were behind them. However, like Millar, Glasgow did itself proud on Sunday. The race itself was fantastic: it was well organised and well supported. But it also seems to have been good for other people too. For a start, it prompted the Council to fix the roads in the centre of town, which is a big deal for the drivers of Glasgow. Not only that, but the Council has carried on with the work and other roads are now being improved. It also got people excited about a sport which is growing in Scotland. I’ve heard stories of customers chatting about the race in shops, and if Instagram and Facebook are anything to go by, many folk who had no interest in cycling enjoyed it almost as much as the sad acts (like me) who watched it from beginning to end.

There are plenty of other things going on in the city at the moment too: the east end is more or less being re-developed for the Commonwealth Games; Strathclyde University is building what seems to be a new campus in the middle of town; and many of the huge tower blocks are being demolished to make way for more sociable social housing. If you look to the east of the country, the new forth crossing (have they picked a name for that yet?) is growing out of the depths at an impressive rate and on an impressive scale and if you look north Aberdeen seems to be booming.

We haven’t had a really positive message from TF for a few weeks now, primarily because there hasn’t seemed to be a lot to be positive about. However, that makes it all the sweeter when you look around and see things improving.

So, to the Tash. Unfortunately, Dave Millar appears to have never rocked a Tash. However, there’s a cyclist who will hopefully be on your screens for the next three weeks who does. I saw him riding in the Giro a few weeks ago and made a quick note of his name. Ladies and gents, this chap must be the happiest looking man ever to ride the Tour, Jose Perez:
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Have a fantastic weekend folks!
Keep going!
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The best small country in the world

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Morning Tash Appreciators,

First on this week’s short agenda is a big “THANK YOU!” to those who sponsored the Etape Caledonia riders last weekend. On the ride itself, records (and bikes) were smashed to pieces and a thoroughly enjoyable – but painful – few hours was spent by all while clattering round the country roads of rural Perthshire. 
Next, I have some bad news and some good news.
In the bad news, it appears that Nigel Farage (the poster boy of closet racists across the country) once attempted to pull off a Tash:

The good news is two-fold: Firstly, Mr Farage has realised that he can’t quite manage to pull off the Tash and has resorted to look which, in TF’s view, is much more fitting for a man of his stature:

The second piece of good news is that Mr Farage visited Edinburgh this week and was given a welcome which must make the Scottish Tash Appreciators amongst us exceptionally proud. According to The Guardian, he was forced to leave a pub on the Royal Mile to chants of, amongst other things, “Nigel, you’re a bawbag, Nigel you’re a bawbag, na, na, na, hey!” It looked like this:
 
 

Sometimes, and quite often when it comes to politics, this wee country of ours just gets it absolutely, positively, spot on. Haste ye back, Mr Farage, we dare you.
 
Nigel Farage cannot be this week’s Tash so here’s something more appropriate: a man standing outside Hampden, rocking a Tash, while wearing Irn Bru sunglasses and a saltire shirt:
 

Have a great weekend folks.
 
Keep going!
p.s. This week’s TF is in no way to be construed as being related to the independence debate.
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Buenos Dias Tash Appreciators,

For one reason or another, targets have been on my mind this week.  For example, scenes like this got me thinking:

I use a train service which runs every 15 minutes. However, a couple of times this week (this very moment being one of them) the train I have been waiting for has been 20 minutes late. 

Thankfully, the train company has a helpful app to keep me up-to-date with developments. Strangely, the app says the train has been cancelled but the board on the platform says it’s just delayed and the announcer says the train “is approaching the platform”. The station announcer is clearly lying. The train I was initially waiting for isn’t approaching the platform and it’s not delayed. What’s really happening is that my train has been cancelled and the train which was due after it is 5 minutes late. 

The reason for this lie is that the rail company has targets to meet and if it fails to meet those targets the company will be fined. The reason there are targets is that when the rail system was privatised, consumers were told that strict standards would be imposed upon the companies who won the rights to operate the routes. It’s therefore in the operator’s interest to claim that the train is late rather than admit what’s really going on. 

Last year, this particular operator was fined £374,000 for failing to meet the required standards of service. When this was announced, both the operator and the Government hailed it as a triumph: this was the third drop in fines in a row and standards must therefore be getting higher. 

The problem is that there’s a disconnect between the result of the target being hit and what the customer actually wants: a service that runs on time, has plenty of seats and doesn’t cost the earth.  I don’t blame the operator; they’re hitting their targets. The blame, in my opinion, rests with the Government in setting targets that can be so easily manipulated.  

If you want a target which has some meaning, you have to set parameters which are appropriate for what you’re measuring. For example, spring will see many of you working out your annual targets for the coming year. If you’re in sales, your target will be to sell X number of products; if you’re in manufacturing, your target will be to make Y number of products; and if you’re in the service industry, your target will be to deliver Z services. 

But that’s too simplistic. The target also has to be realistic and balanced. To continue with trains, I don’t expect every train to be on time. The weather is poor today so I understand that the train might be late. The target therefore can’t just be about delivering the service. Other factors have to be considered too, such as whether the customer is happy and whether the service is of a decent quality. Targets shouldn’t be just figures.

Even though I use this train service five days a week for about 46 weeks of the year, I’ve never been asked what I think about it . Surely, it’s the customers’ views that should be the ultimate barometer of whether it’s a good service or not.  I think that’s something that gets lost these days; particularly when companies and the public sector are struggling for cash. After all, if the customer isn’t happy, what are we all doing?

To the Tash! A man who always hit his target and who always keeps his customers (“the poor”) happy: it’s Robin Hood:

Until next week…

Keep going!

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

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Morning Tash Appreciators,
Firstly, following many complaints, may I take this opportunity to apologise for the lack of a Tash last week. It was a fundamental error for which there is no excuse. Disciplinary measures have been taken and heads are rolling around TF HQ. This both fits in with last week’s TF and also is simply a cracker:

Now, to business. 
TF cannot ignore the death of Baroness Thatcher or the debate about the celebrations which took place on twitter and in cities across the country. TF is of course neutral when it comes to politics and this allows the chance to sit back and look at the reactions of both “the right” and “the left”. In a way, it’s nice to see a difference between the two for a change. 
Rather than criticising either “side”, it might be useful to simply suggest an alternative to the kind of “debate” which we currently seem to have about every issue of importance. I came across an article in The Scotsman from January this year written by John Sturrock QC (one of the country’s leading mediators) in which he suggests a protocol upon which to promote a productive debate of the issue of Scottish independence. The protocol is equally applicable to politics (and life) in general. He says this:
Under pressure, it is all too easy to default back into reactive or defensive mode, allowing emotion to predominate over more reasoned and measured responses. But nobody gains if antagonism prevails.
 
In an attempt to encourage a more constructive debate, he goes on to suggest that we agree to the following:
 
  • Listen carefully to all points of view and seek fully to understand what concerns and motivates those with differing views from our own;
  • Acknowledge that there are many points of view and that these have validity alongside our own;
  • Show respect and courtesy to all individuals and organisations, whatever views they may hold and however they may express them;
  • Express our own views clearly and honestly with transparency about our motives and our interests;
  • Use language carefully and avoid personal or other remarks which might cause unnecessary offence;
  • Ask questions if we do not understand what others are saying or proposing;
  • Respond to questions asked of us with clarity and openness;
  • Support what we say with clear and credible information wherever that is available.

It’s a simple solution but it’s also one which would require a bit of determination to see to the end. After all, many of us (including myself) have a pre-disposition to lose objectivity when debating something which is important to us. 

I’ll only single out one person for criticism in light of this week’s events. It pains me to do it as he has rocked a Tash in the past (and his appearance before the US Senate was absolutely tremendous) but he really could do with learning a lesson in sensible and useful debate. I am talking about George Galloway MP:

Mr Galloway is a member of the Respect Party. However, I fear the foundations upon which the party were built have been washed away; perhaps by all the Bollinger he was drinking to celebrate the death of Baroness Thatcher. This is part of an emerging pattern: he recently left a debate at the Oxford Union simply because his opponent (a student) was Israeli. Mr Galloway says that he “does not debate with Israelis”. 

In the wake of Baroness Thatchers death, he said on twitter “tramp the dirt down”.  Do we really need that? Is it not enough to simply disagree with someone? In the spirit of debate, I’ll let you all decide. 

Have a great weekend folks!
Keep going!

Oh Indeed…

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Morning Tash Appreciators,

I was watching the American Office this week when a new boss appeared to ruin Michael’s fun:

That’s Idris Elba and he’s best known for his role in The Wire as the gangster-turned-economics-student, Stringer Bell. 

Despite having a superb Tash, Stringer is not a nice guy. It’s not a plot spoiler to say that he’s a murdering drug dealer who is driven only by cash. However, he’s not an entirely dislikable character. 

The same goes for one of Stringer’s enemies: Omar Little. He’s also a murderer but, rather than dealing drugs, he steals them and sells them to other gangsters. Although, on paper, he’s as bad a man as Stringer, in many ways he’s the hero of the show. Why? Because, in his words, “a man needs a code”, and he lives by his. He doesn’t hurt civilians and he takes his grandma to church on Sundays. That being said, if you saw him in the street you wouldn’t necessarily know that he’s a man of high morals:

The real villains of the show don’t physically hurt anyone. On the contrary, they hold themselves out as being the saviours of the poor people of Baltimore. Unfortunately, they are greedy, conniving, duplicitous and altogether rather unpleasant. Here’s one of them:

That’s Senator Clay Davis. Yes, you got it, it’s the politicians who do the real damage. This is another example of Tash being rocked by a baddie. Clay Davis, and the other politicians in the show, don’t have a code in the same way as Omar; they’re out for power rather than just money and so they’re not as predictable as Stringer. Not only this, but they’re meant to represent the people and so the damage they do is far greater.  

The work of David Simon, the creator of The Wire, is known for being true to real life; he researches everything meticulously. I’m not suggesting that the real Senator for Maryland accepts bribes the same way clay Davis does but I bet that Simon had someone in mind when he wrote the character. 

In this country, I don’t think our politicians are any better. They serve their own purposes, no-one else’s. For example, Theresa May is apparently set to announce plans to take the UK out of the European Convention on Human Rights. 

She’s not doing this because she doesn’t agree with the legislation (the right to free speech – which I’m using here – is, I understand, generally thought to be worth having), she just wants the votes that the Tories are losing to the “latent racism party” (aka UKIP). Our Home Secretary cares more about votes than she does the fundamental rights of citizens. I could go on about the rest of our right-honourable representatives, but I won’t for the moment. 

Give me Omar and his code any day. At least if Omar was Home Secretary, we civilians would be safe…

Have a good weekend folks.

Keep going!

We could be heroes

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Hello Tash Appreciators,

This will be the second to last TF of what is, incredibly, Tash Friday’s second year.

Earlier this week, I had a look back at what I said around this time last year. As some of you may recall, last year’s festive TFs looked at Christmases Past, Present and Future.

In the final TF of 2011, I said this:

With the Tash of Christmas Future, I hope that we can all look ahead to the things that can be achieved or, more excitingly, attempted. After all, it is only by pushing ourselves beyond what we perceive as our capabilities that we can really test our mettle. It’s also at these times that we tend to find that we are capable of doing more, and going further, than we thought possible.

If you look back at 2012 you can see numerous examples of people who did just that:

Closer to home, 2012 has seen numerous new jobs (100% decrease in unemployment among Tash Appreciators); new houses; exotic holidays; an engagement or two; weddings; and what would appear to be, in the main, relative contentment.Friday morning rhetoric about getting stuck in, aiming higher than just an “acceptable” level and about life being too short is one thing but it looks very much like this year exceeded expectations. If we had sat down a year ago, and recorded our hopes for the year, would we have thought ourselves too ambitious by suggesting that all of the above would happen? Yes, is probably the answer.

The question we therefore have to ask ourselves is: what’s next?

We must be ambitious, enthusiastic, vigorous and determined. The coming year will not bring financial prosperity for the nation or even, dare I say it, any indication that we’re on the right track towards it. However, this year has shown we can do just fine; even in times of relative hardship. Onwards and upwards must be our battle-cry!

So that leaves us with this week’s Tash. Serendipitously, Bowie just faded into my earphones and so, with the words “just for one day…” ringing in my ears, I leave you with this week’s Tash (from the excellent movie The Prestige), David Bowie:

See you next week for the end of year/world edition…Cheers.